Lonely

A walk to the ocean, where
Tides with their regular action,
With gentle breeze cordoning, together
Pile up the crowd on a bright sunny evening.

I hear a voice, far from the noise,
Between the happiness on earth,
all alone from the sky.
The creation of God,
sometimes hard and hostile.
Looking at, the moving waters in ocean
Where people making their presence felt.

“Oh dear fellas, you worship me as God,
Accepted me as the king of solar system,
Enjoying my light rays now, but
Why there is no one to question my loneliness?”

“My dear friend, have you ever thought,
Why people are stamping me, forgetting
The resources I provided them?” asked,
The dead man’s land - the earth, to
The hot lemon in the sky.

“We are here, to make them
Live for ever. Though sometimes
Gruelling, it’s the orders from the god.
Not all can do it except the noble.
That’s why we last forever
All alone but standing tall”.

The heat reduced, happiness pierced the sky as,
The rainbow creamed the place for more glory.
Realised, not only the sun, but
All those who heard them speak
“Enjoy the happiness in loneliness”.

The Reversal Day

My heart doesn’t have the strength to tell you that I need you
My heart doesn’t have the strength to tell me to live without you

My heart may not have the strength,
But it always has space for you.

My thoughts always want to be with you,
But my mind wants to spend at least a moment with you

I want to hold your hands when you are in front of me,
But reality blocks it from happening

I am waiting for the day when,
Dream becomes reality so you will be mine.

The God mother

It was a very bad day. I had a meeting at 10 am but got up at 9 30. So, I had to call up my team leader to postpone the meeting to afternoon. I was riding my bike half asleep. I was sure to hit something on the way and as expected I did hit an auto. I am not a bad driver but wasn’t good that day. Anyways I signed the late register and switched on my computer. I was still sleepy so the day went with more than 5 coffees, 3 to 4 teas and equal amount of soups. I got a call from my friend and he was pissed off as I didn’t inform him about my new job. Spicing up to all these things, my mom asked me to come home earlier that day which i couldn't. So she blasted me. I was very angry with myself, so I went to marina beach. I started to run, ran from one end to the other. Right from triplicane to anna square covered around 2.5kms I guess. Then was tired and sat on a small boat and was watching the sea. I realized it wasn’t dark as the moon was in full form. Just 2 days left for the full moon day. So it was bright and I kept watching the moon. It reminded me of all the small stories I heard during my childhood days. I was looking at moon for 10 to 15 minutes. Suddenly I felt the moon was coming to me. In a moment it was gone. I started to watch her again. Our history and religion considers moon as a man but since it was beautiful on that day, I felt moon must be a very beautiful women. If she is a beautiful woman, then why the hell is she all alone in the sky. Other stars are very far from her. I closed my eyes and started dreaming.

Once upon a time moon had a lover and she was very happy. He was called the earth. They danced together, they laughed together, they cried together. The entire universe was happy for them and thought they were made for each other. Their fame rose to the summit. The gods grew jealous of their love and wanted to separate them. All their tricks failed and the entire universe was supporting the couple. At last they finally decided to use their power. The big bang happened. The entire universe was separated. The earth and moon started to rotate and revolve around the light of sun in search for each other. All the others were also searching for them to unite them. One fine day moon and earth saw each other but very far from each other. Fearing of their re-union the gods cursed earth and moon, “If you both try to come together, the lives of your creation, i.e. the trees, the animals will all be destroyed by our forces like wind, water which controls your world”. From that day on, both the moon and earth were not able to be together. But for all the other people in the space, they still made a good pair. They were the best couples. The earth is very happy and bright when the moon is nearby though the god’s forces like tides rise on the occasion just to remind them of their curse. When the moon can’t be found, the earth looks dull and sad. They believed, their creations like humans, plants and animals will always connect them together every day. That’s why in any part of the world right from our childhood days we hear stories about moon. If your child doesn’t eat properly we take them out, show them the moon and tell the stories about our godmother (moon) and the child eats. It brings the family together at the end of the day. It brings in the ecstasy needed for the couple to express their love. It brings in gentleness and peace. More of all it sheds its light in the dark regions of the earth during the night.

Someone was tapping me. I opened my eyes to see a small child asking for money. I checked my pocket and it was empty. The child was richer than me at that time. I nodded my head saying no to him and came back to the present world. It was a great stress buster. I almost forgot about the entire day and was happy in the end. I looked up in the sky. I could see her smile. I thanked her and left the beach. I found my bike in the parking area and started it. I adjusted the mirror and in it I could see my godmother saying bid adieu. I reciprocated with a smile and left the place. But she still followed me ever after in the night except for few days in a month.

MANI

“Mani. Come here“. The door opened slowly. He was standing behind the door. He opened the door slowly and made himself visible for others with a shy smile. He saw three people sitting in the room. One was kamala aunty with whom he was staying. “He is little bit shy. But actually he was asking about you people the whole night. He didn’t allow me to sleep. He was very excited the moment when I said you are coming to meet him”, kamala aunty said with a smile. “Come here Mani. Meet Mr. Swaminathan and Mrs. Vasanthi swaminathan ”. He came and sat in the small chair right next to Mrs. Swaminathan. He was holding a file very tightly. Mrs. Swaminathan was very happy to see him. She placed her hand on his head, almost blessing him. “What is your name?”, she asked. He replied “I am Mr. Manikandan”. Everyone sitting out there laughed. “So sweet” she said and gently pinched his cheek. “How old are you?” she continued her interview. “I am 5 years old”. “hmm. Big boy” she smiled and continued “Do you like chocolates or Ice cream?” she asked in the sweetest tone possible. He was blushing. He doesn’t know what to answer. They liked it. He was not able to sit in the same place even for few minutes. He was moving here and there sitting in the chair. They understood that he was excited. “Do you like both Ice cream and chocolate?” He said yes by nodding his head and then blushed at them. “We have got something for you”, she said and gave him a plastic bag. He opened immediately. His smile stretched to a mile and his face was glowing brighter after opening the bag. Kamala aunty was curious to know the reason for his big smile “what is that Mani?” “Ice creammmmm”, he screamed and continued “chocolatesssssss” the volume was increasing “and a dressssss”, he was happy to the core. “So kind of you”, kamala aunty to Mr. and Mrs. Swaminathan. “It’s a pleasure for us to be here and we actually wanted to bring a lot. We were also excited”, Mr. Swaminathan spoke for the first time. “Say thanks to uncle and aunty”. “Thank you uncle, thank you aunty”, he smiled and started holding the bag tightly along with the file. Mr. Swaminathan noticed that and asked him “what is there in the file?”. His eyes were answering but words were not coming out of his mouth. Kamala aunty understood his shyness and she started, “That is his hobby. He actually wanted to show it to you. But he is a little bit shy”. Everyone then looked at him. His happiness faded away and his face turned red. He didn’t want kamala aunty to tell about his shyness. He was very cute and sweet even in his anger. Mrs. Swaminathan smiled at him and lifted him from the chair and placed him above her lap. “What is your hobby?” she asked. “Can I see the file? Please”, Mr. Swaminathan trying desperate efforts to look at his hobby and he did succeed. He opened the file. A small notebook was there. He opened the notebook. The first page read, “?. Manikandan”, Mr. Swaminathan was alarmed on seeing this, but didn’t react. He continued reading it further, Leaf collection notebook. “So you are a leaf collector, very good. I like trees and leaves you know”, he was motivating him. “Really? How many leaves have you collected?” for the first time he asked them a question. “I have collected, one bigggggg notebook of leaves”, said Mr. Swaminathan. He was becoming a child. Mani’s curiosity increased, he wanted to show them he is the best, “Really? I have collected leaves from 10 trees”. His innocence won their hearts. Mrs. Swaminathan immediately kissed all over his face and she started holding tightly. Swaminathan continued “Wow. I can only collect leaves from 2 trees. In fact you know no one has collected leaves from ten trees”. “Really?” Mani asked with a small surprise. His face was brighter than ever. He was very proud of himself. Mr. Swaminathan was turning the pages with excitement. The leaves were almost same. He admired his innocence. He turned to the last page. He found something very interesting, which left him shell shocked, but didn’t react much. It had leaves arranged in two rows in the middle of the notebook which bisected a plant drawn. The leaves were shaded in black. The plant was green. A flower falls from the plant on one side with a small stem and two leaves with it. The leaves of the flower on one side were asking for help from the plant, which on other side, have two hands and want to pull back its flower. He closed the notebook and placed it on the table with a false smile in his face. “So, have you made some plans?” kamala aunty asked them. Mr. and Mrs. Swaminathan looked at each other. Mr. Swaminathan broke the silence maintained for few seconds “It was a great pleasure to be here first of all. We need some time to finalize things from our side. Once we are done with that, we will call you again. Is that ok?”. “No problem, take your time”, kamala aunty smiled at them. But that was just a formality smile. She has seen a lot of people like Swaminathan family. “Ok. Then we will leave now. Thank you”. “I have to thank you for spending some time with us”. “Mani will be very happy”. They looked at Mani, he was not smiling anymore. He knows that they are leaving. He was very upset. He wanted them to take him with them. He was dreaming the whole night about this. Mrs. Swaminathan went to him and lifted him up and kissed him on his forehead. She then said, “We will come tomorrow with more chocolates and Ice cream, Ok?” The gloomy face turned bright. He was all happy again. His ray of hopes came back with much higher intensity. Mr. and Mrs. Swaminathan then left the room and walked outside. It was very dark and cloudy. They stepped into their car and watched the building from there. It read “Home for God’s children”. Mrs. Swaminathan could not control her tears. She asked him, “Shall we adopt this boy?”. He could understand her. The best thing for any women is attaining motherhood, which makes every woman, divine. It’s been more than 6 years since they got married. She was hoping to attain the divine status one day or the other, until last evening when gynecologists thrashed her dreams. Swaminathan knows how badly she wants to have a kid. He loves her very much. In order to console her, both of them came to this orphanage. Mr. Swaminathan hasn’t answered the question she asked. “What happened? What is stopping you from adopting this boy? He is very sweet and cute. Please let’s take this boy with us”. He was quiet. “What happened?”, she wants to know a valid reason for his silence, she continued “Don’t you like the boy?”. “No. I love him. I came here only because of you. But I like this kid”, atlast he broke the silence. “What will happen if his mother returns one day and asks him back?”. “Why are you talking like this? No mother will leave her child like this. If they leave, it means either they are dead or the child was not born to a proper relationship. So they will not return. I don’t care about the way the child is born. It was not his mistake. I want this child”, her agony has to be answered. “We don’t know about their situation. When I was looking at the child’s notebook, I realized he wants to meet his mother one day or the other. What will you do if he say’s one day that, you are not my mother? Tell me. We need a child who is much younger than Mani, so that he doesn’t know what has happened in future. Our child should not know that he was an orphan”. She didn’t expect this. She started crying. “Hey listen. Let’s go home and decide”. The car took off from that place. Meanwhile, Inside the Kamala aunty’s room “Everyone comes and asks we want to adopt a child. Then they see a child and create so much hope to the child and then thrashes it. What is wrong with Mani? So far 7 people came to see him. Why should they come here and induce ray of hope on him and pull it back? Only god has to do something for him”. “Leave it mother. Let him be here along with the 15 other children”, kamala aunty’s assistant. “No kala that is not the problem. He can stay here as long as he wants. He is our child. But if he stays here, his standard of living will not develop. We don’t have that much money to educate him. Our sponsors are generous to provide food and shelter and not for their studies. If he can get parents, then I am sure he will reach great heights. Otherwise, these children will remain orphans for ever or they have to struggle through their remaining lives. Of all they will get some love from the world. They will have an initial to put in front of them rather than a question mark. Mani is already 5 and he is the eldest among others. It will be very difficult for him in future. That’s why I am worried”. Suddenly, Mani entered the room. Both of them were shocked to see him. They didn’t want him to hear what they were speaking. “Mani what are you doing here?” “My file”, he replied in a low tone. She hoped he didn’t hear anything. Mani took the file and holding it firmly, looked at kamala aunty then he asked her, “why didn’t they like me?”. She was stunned by that question from him. He continued “Why so many people came and gave me chocolates but no one took me with them?” Kamala ran towards him and lifted him immediately. He could not control his tears neither she could. “No, no, dear nothing like that. Swaminathan uncle has told he will bring you more chocolates. He will surely come. Don’t worry”. “When will he come again? Everyone said they will come tomorrow, but no one came after that”. Tears started flooding the room. After a long time, finally she made consoled him and made him sleep after dinner. But kamala could not sleep, neither the swaminathan family. Mani has affected them a lot with his innocence. They have heard a lot about him from kamala before seeing him. He is a very smart, responsible kid. Every parent would love to have their sons and daughters to be like him. But no one wants him. It was around 2 am. Mrs. Swaminathan looked at his husband. He was awake. “Not sleeping?” she asked him. “I couldn’t”. “Why?” “Because of Mani. I could still see him blushing at us”. “Please, let’s bring him. I am sure he won’t go. Poor child. He has no one for him and he can’t stay in the orphanage for a long time. Please”. Her eyes were bubbling with tears and can burst at anytime. Swaminathan, “We will bring him tomorrow”. “What did you say?” she was astonished and wants to confirm that she heard it right. “Yes, we will bring him tomorrow”. Now the tears busted from her eyes with joy, she didn’t expect this answer from him. “Why did you take so much time and make me cry?” “Because, I liked him so much. But I was worried, if he leaves us in half a way through our lives, we won’t be able to digest. But then, when I placed myself in Mani’s position, I immediately decided to bring him home. He needs love. He is longing for love of mother and father. I am sure he won’t leave us. He will always have a place for his mother who gave birth in his heart. But more than that, I am sure he will have a special place for us in his heart, if he is with us. He will like us. He won’t leave us”. They hugged each other. “I am sorry. I made you cry”, he apologized to her. It’s hard to see tears and smile coming at the same time. But they managed to do that.

Next Day “Mani. Come here”. This time Mani opened the door and walked in slowly. He was walking towards them with his head down. He didn’t look at them and was holding his file firmly. He thought another interview for nothing. “Mani. We have something for you”. He has heard this voice before. It was not from kamala aunty. He slowly lifted his head above. It was Mr. and Mrs. Swaminathan. His whole face was filled with joy. He dropped his file and took the bag from them. He realized they are here to take him with them. The bag was full of chocolates and Ice cream. He said, “Thank you uncle, Thank you aunty”. “I am not your aunty. Call me mom”. Even though he is a 5 year old kid, he understood. After all, mother is the only visible god on earth. Everyone busted with tears except Mr. Swaminathan. He bent down slowly and took Mani’s file. He opened the notebook. It read “?. Manikandan”. He then stroked the question mark and wrote ‘S’ and gave it to Mani. What better gift Mani can get. “You know what, today is Mani’s birthday. He was brought to this place 5 yrs before on this day and this is the best birthday gift he can ever get. I am very happy for him. Don’t forget us Mani” kamala aunty said while whipping off her tears. Mani immediately ran towards her and she lifted him and placed kisses all around his face. “That’s why I wanted them to call me as kamala aunty even though they are my children. If not I won’t let them go and neither they will leave this place and make their lives better”. It’s a new beginning for Mani. He packed all his things and was prepared to leave. He said good bye to everyone happily and got blessings from kamala aunty and left the place with them. Everyone in the building dispersed to continue their work. Kamala aunty stood there for some time. She looked above in the sky and thanked the god for showering the lights in Mani’s life. The dark clouds slowly departed and the sun came out for the first time in 2 days during this rainy season. She smiled and left to her room. The sunlight hit one of the leaves, which was shaded black in sketch.

A thing to think

I have to wake up. It’s already 8 in the morning. But I want to sleep more. I can hear my mobile shouting at me, like my mom used to do during my school days. I kept the alarm to snooze for 10 minutes and started sleeping again. I have been doing that for more than an hour. I started sleeping at 10 pm yesterday. Still, sleeping for those 10 minutes after switching off the alarm gives me immense pleasure and the best sleep. But I can’t keep doing that. My practical exam starts at 8:30 am today. It takes 5 minutes from my hostel room to the lab. It will take 10 minutes to brush up and have coffee, 10 minutes for me to take a shower and another 10 minutes to get ready. Oh my god only 30 minutes left. I have to skip something. I can’t go late for the exam. I can’t skip coffee, that’s my only breakfast. Ok, I can take shower in the evening. But it’s been more than 3 days since the last time I took bath. "Wake up brag. Wake up", I said to myself. I took the brush and opened the door. The Sun was happily shining. Some people were leaving in a hurry either for their exam or to meet their girl friends, while those who don’t have exams came leisurely from the breakfast. I was peeking through all the windows on my way to the bathroom searching for it. Yes. I found it. Colgate toothpaste. It was 5 rooms away from mine. Most of the doors will be open all the time, even when there is no one in the room. We share almost everything, except our underpants.

It was 8:10 am. Coffee was too hot. I left it on the table and went to wash my face. I took the deodorant and emptied almost one quarter of it. I don’t mind in using that much deodorant as long as it’s not mine. Vasanth was my victim this time. I can’t find my shirt. Oh shit it’s already 8:20. Just drank the coffee at one go, took my Nandy's shirt and left the room at 8:25. "Yes, I will be on time", I thought. Oh no, not again. I was half way through and realized that I forgot my pen. I am going to an exam without a pen. Great. "Shit happens man. Come on, you have to manage dear."

"Choose one paper from here, then sign in the attendance list and go to the seat marked on the paper", she didn’t even look at me. "Mmm… Mam, ahh, can I get a pen to sign here please?" She looked at me for the first time. A big bindi in her forehead, made her look like an avatar of Goddess Kali. I have seen the goddess in pictures. She has her mouth wide open with tongue protruding out and a dead body of a devil at her foot, with its head in one of her hand. I saw my head in her hand. I closed my eyes and opened it again. She stood up from the chair, "Where is your pen? Are you coming for an exam without a pen? Irresponsible Idiots. The entire class is like this", Idiots? Thank God. I am not alone. "Sorry mam. I was talking to the Vice chancellor in the hostel mess. He was asking about the food. So I was waiting for him to leave. Then it was so late, I was in a hurry. Extremely sorry mam. You know about me mam". My mind gave a small pat. She stared at me, but that’s not important. I got a pen atlast. I was smiling around the people as they knew it was a lie. We exchanged glances about the difficulty level of the exam. It was an easy experiment for me. I gave the oral examination well and left the room within 2 hours.

I went straight to the canteen, ordered a dosa and was waiting for it. It’s been more than 6 months since I had breakfast in the hostel mess, for which I pay the money. It’s compulsory to pay for the food in mess if you stay in hostel. There was no choice. I still remember the first time I went to mess for the breakfast. It was Idli with sambar and coconut chutney. I was very hungry. When I touched it, the soft, solid Idli shattered into pieces. I found something. What the hell is a piece of newspaper doing here? After that, I never go by that side except for some special occasions or during my financial crisis when I can’t eat outside. "Hi man. How are you?" I realized I was in canteen. It was Peter. I don’t even remember his original name. Peter is the common nick name for show‐off people. I don’t know what he showed, but the name was a hit among the hostel mates. My dosa came. "What’s that dude?" as if he never saw a dosa in his life before. "That’s roti", I replied without reacting much. He sliced almost half of the dosa using his hand, without asking my permission and drove it into his mouth. Without a second thought, I picked up the remaining and engulfed it. "Where is the dosa dude? So hungry?" He smiled, but I could hear his mind voice I should have picked some more in the other hand. "Yeah. I was hungry". After he left, I had a tea along with the view of some beautiful junior girls present at that moment. I made a new hypothesis that time. Girls are equal to boys when they are hungry. I was looking at priyanka, her fingers rolling into her mouth. Each finger got a separate chance to stick on her tongue and filtered by the lips when the finger is taken out. She tried the same formula of peter with her neighbor, but didn’t work. So far, I thought only boys do all these stuffs in public. After sometime, they left the place and she walked like a show stopper in the fashion show. I liked that in fact enjoyed that. It was only 11. What to do next?

I could hardly see 10 people in the room with 50 computers for browsing. It’s free, a point worth mentioning. There was a log notebook near the entrance where you need to enter the timings and your details. I went near the notebook. The person in charge was sitting nearby it. I took a pen and acted as though I was entering the details "what’s the time now?", I asked. "It’s 11:05 am and you have to log out by 11:35". I could feel my mind uttering a Maniacal laugh like the villains in the old movies. I switched on the computer. It took almost 5 minutes to open a web page. I was waiting patiently. Then, I opened the orkut. As usual, no one left me a scrap. I just checked few new pictures uploaded by my school friends and logged out. I was then searching for some universities in United States to continue my studies after graduation. Every week, I try to browse for some universities to get more information. I saw my watch. It was 11 30. Still half an hour left for lunch. You have a text message, my mobile beeped. "Hi. Shall we go out for lunch? Kathik is also coming. Ask mukundan if he wants to join us. I am in canteen with giri". It was ashwin. I was relieved. I got plans to kill the remaining time for the day now. We are going to a restaurant which is approximately 20km from our university. Anyways we would like to skip our mess food as much as we can. But unfortunately it’s expensive to eat everyday outside and pay the bills for the mess also. The only reason we were staying there was the hostel life. It was too good. I enjoyed it. I refreshed my mailbox. I received a new mail. It’s from Indian Institute of Technology‐Delhi, one of the most renowned institutes in India. "Congratulations. Your work has been selected for the poster presentation. Please confirm your participation by sending us a mail before 30 Jan 2006. Once you confirm your participation, all the other details will be mailed to you". I replied and came out at 12. We regrouped our gang in canteen and went to the restaurant.

"Your attention please, Train number 2611/2612, Tamil Nadu Express, from Chennai Central Railway station to New Delhi Railway station will leave in few minutes from platform number 4". The announcement was also made in Tamil and Hindi. "Bye mom. Bye. I will call you once I reach there." The train left. This was my first trip to the national capital. For the next 33 hours we will cover about 2200 km’s, starting from the southern part of India, travelling through most of the central part of India to the northern part of India. Each has its own distinction, its own heritage, language, culture. Truly amazing. "Apart from that we should go to the mughal gardens. It will be open only during February every year. It is just behind the Rashtrapathi bhavan, the president house." "Hey, we are staying there only for 3 days and all 3 days we have conference. Then how can we go? It won’t be nice to skip the conference as we came here for that only". I understood. Ramasamy was at his best. It might take sometime to convince him but I was sure to convince him. We then decided to think about it later and started to talk about the conference, our class, and of course girls, all roads lead to Rome.

I don’t even dream about it. I got up at 7. Not often it has happened in my life. I felt something was wrong. There was a strange noise. I got up immediately and saw the fan right above me in the upper birth. I was wondering where the noise comes from. It sounds like a vacuum cleaner. I looked down to see a big guy in pyjama around 45 to 50 years of age, having coffee. In a moment, I felt as if I was entering into his mouth. I bent down to check what Ramasamy was doing. He was already awake and was sitting near the window. I came down. "Got up so early?" "I couldn’t sleep. I got up at 6. They were making lot of noise". We were speaking in Tamil. We believed the rest don’t understand it. "Hello boys. Good morning" he said to us in English. Buuurrrrbbuurrr. It was the same sound you hear when Bullet bike pass through you. It was associated with rotten egg smell. "What the hell did he have for dinner yesterday?" "Welcome to the Club dear. He has been doing this for the past 20 minutes now." "Then why the hell are you sitting in this place and smelling it. Shit man, I can’t tolerate it anymore." I was controlling my breath and took the paste and brush which was luckily not deep inside my bag and left to the wash room. "Hey wait for me". Ramasamy followed. We both opened the entrance door of the train and were trying to inhale the fresh air. "Thank god, we escaped, I feel sorry for his wife. That was a powerful bio‐weapon". Perfect timing. Just as rams completed the sentence, he passed by us. Drrrrrrrrrr. Oh no, not again. He blushed at us and entered the toilet.

We both had coffee. The coffee was not that good so just had half of it and threw away the remaining through the window. The train was 30 minutes late. We were in Warangal station at 7:30 am. We had sometime to get down. "You need something to eat?" ramasamy asked me. "What are going to eat?" I counter attacked him. "I will get some biscuits and banana". "Ok. I will also eat that. Also get me 2 masala vada". The masala vada was not hot, so I didn’t feel like eating it, so as Ramasamy. I again threw it from the train. We shared the remaining stuffs and were back to bed after a sweet and light breakfast.

Where am I?. I looked at my watch, it was around 3:30 in the afternoon. Is the train on time? If so then, we would have crossed Nagpur by now. Ramasamy was snoring. Slowly I said, "Rams, rams". He could hear my words. His eyes slowly and partially widened up. He swallowed the saliva running from his mouth using his tongue and responded "hmmmmm". "Are you in deep sleep?" Wow. Excellent question to ask a person who is sleeping. I was also sleepy, at the same time hungry. He again responded promptly even when half asleep "hmmm". "Let’s go and have lunch. Don’t sleep in empty stomach". "I had lunch in Balharshah Junction. I tried to wake you up, but you didn’t. The train was 1.5 hrs late. I will sleep now" he continued his sleep. "Hello sir", I was afraid to ask him as he was the only person awake in our compartment, the same guy in the pyjama. I maintained some distance though to avoid sudden bio‐weapon attack and make a great escape if needed. "Do you have any idea, where are we now. Is it running on time?". "We crossed Nagpur 30 minutes before. The train is 1.5 hours late". "Oh. when is the next stop?" "Next stop will be at around 19:30 or something. Are you going to Delhi?" "Sorry, can I just go to pantry and come back. I am hungry". "ok ok continue". I had my lunch and was having coffee. The train was not moving for the past 5 minutes. I came to know it might take 15 to 20 minutes.

I stepped out of the train. It stopped in no man’s land. I could see a garbage dumping ground. The track was laid with sharp stones. It was very difficult to walk even with sandals. Even though I stepped out of the train, I was very close to the door, so that I can enter anytime if train starts again. I saw children playing on the track. Wait a minute, no they are not playing. They are eating something. Then, I saw him running towards them in this hot sunny afternoon with bare legs. He was crying. He was wearing his birthday suit gifted by god, with a small thread tied to his waist. His hands were swinging fast in the air, so as his cute bell. I believe he must be a 3 to 5 year old gentleman. She noticed him coming; she was the eldest in the group I suppose. Hardly, half of my lifetime so far. She took him to her waist. She wiped his mucous secretion from the nose using her hands and cleaned it in her gown. By the time she stopped his cry, the rest have packed all the foods and were waiting for instructions. They went near the dumping ground and sat in a circle under the shades of the wall. I was the lonely person now to take the shower of heat from the sun. They started to share the food. The girl sat along with him and filled both his hands with some food. Apart from that she also fed him. He is enjoying the meal. He shows the hand to the girl sitting nearby and is asking her to take some from it. He is so sweet. When she was about to take it, he puts that in his mouth. Cheat, Sweet cheat  He is enjoying and so as me. There were some hiccups in the group, I guess. I wish I could quench their thirst with water. But, the water from my eyes is not enough. It needs a much more powerful source. Maybe from the eyes of entire nation. I don’t know when the eyes will be open to see them. The train started to move. I want to stay here. I can’t even puncture the train tyres. I jumped into the train and was looking at them as much as I can. He was gone. They were gone. I came back to my seat. I saw the pyjama guy, he was sleeping. Ramasamy was snoring. I climbed to my birth and lied down. Happiness lies everywhere, I realized. We just need eyes to open and see what’s happening around us and enjoy each and every moment in life. How beautiful these children are. What was their mistake? Do they have to eat everyday like this, the food wastes which we throw from the train? Pick it up from the railway track and eat in the dumping grounds? Still how many years these children have to suffer? I was thinking all the stuffs which I can. After all, I am just a common man, who thinks a lot but never does anything and waiting for the government to do something. I am just a common man, who has a heart, shielded by the layer of selfishness which sometimes leak but quickly recovered. I was thinking and at one point slept.

"Hello. Wake up dear". It was my wife. "What are you dreaming about?" "Nothing", I smiled at her. I realized, I was in my dream all these time. Your brain brings back your previous memories when you are repeating something. This was my second trip to the capital after 10 years. "coffee?" "Yeah". The coffee was not good. But I didn’t threw it this time. I learnt the significance of food during that trip. I never wasted any food after that. If I don’t like it, I don’t take it. I cannot change the world, but I can change myself. An improvised version of a common man. The train was in Warangal, we were coming from New Delhi to Chennai after a short trip. I went out to buy some food. I saw the crowd was gathered near the window of my compartment. I pushed myself fast to check whether everything was fine with her. She was fine. Our fellow mate was angry. "These children are like this only" in a typical Indian English. He continued "They are not children, they are devils. We have to hand over them to police. Our country is spoiled because of these children. Who knows he might slowly turn into a terrorist in the future". What the hell has happened? Why the hell is he barking? "What happened?" I enquired politely. "I was eating masala dosa near the window. I was searching for the water bottle and suddenly one boy; you won’t believe he was hardly 10 years of age and stealing it sir. How will India develop with these kinds of children being the future pillars. It has increased nowadays. We should not allow it. I gave him nicely. He will dare to repeat the mistake next time". A proud citizen trying to change the fortunes of India. Wow. I put him in my heart and poured all the foul words I can, amplified using the most powerful Speaker System. I am not supporting theft. I would have joined him if it would have been anything but for food. I wouldn’t have felt that much hatred feeling for him, if he had stopped him and got his masala dosa back but unless and until for beating the child hardly 10 years of age. Poverty is our first enemy. I could just think of one thing now. Those children I saw didn’t have food, didn’t have home, didn’t’ have anything except love and care for each other. This highly educated Mr. Peter has all the things except love for all. They could manage some laughter even in those circumstances, while our super dooper citizen can’t even manage a smile. I don’t know whether those children will become a terrorist or is he a terrorist showing no mercy?

I felt her fingers on my hand. Raising her eyebrows with a smile on her face, she asked me. I could understand her question. "Nothing", I replied through asmile. She slowly placed her head on my shoulder and her hand gently around my neck literally hugging me. I was holding her other hand. "Why don’t you like kids?" she asked me "Who said I don’t like? I love them" I was dazzled by that question. "Then when are we going to have one?" She didn’t look at me. But I know she was smiling and blushing. I can feel that. Men are not that expresive. I couldn't find the answer immediatly but somehow I managed. "I am ready. Shall we begin the arrangements from now?". She pinched my arm. I didn’t feel anything, but "ouch, it’s paining". We will reach home tomorrow morning and I know what to do next. A promotion in life. Well, life has to proceed whether you like the way it is or not, after all I am just a common man. I have the rights only to feel, not to do.